SHELISE So, thanks for coming back, James Luceno. JAMES Thanks for having me. SHELISE Yeah, this was one that I had never heard of before and you submitted to be on the show through our drop form, which you guys can always do through our about section, so I was really interested to hear about…
Tag: oto high control group
I Had to Leave Spirituality to Understand It
I Had to Leave Spirituality to Understand It Intro When I was an active spiritual practitioner, I spent an enormous amount of time looking outside spirituality for answers to spiritual questions. The deeper my questions became, the more I found myself relying on fields like philosophy and cognitive psychology rather than spirituality itself. And after…
I Thought I Was Too Smart for a Cult
I Thought I Was Too Smart for a Cult That’s why it worked. Intro The spirituality I was once a part of — Thelema — centered itself on radical individual freedom. Freedom of thought. Freedom of expression. Freedom from coercion. The individual was sacred. Freedom meant answering only to your true self. And yet the…
The Belief System That Can’t Be Wrong
The Belief System That Can’t Be Wrong Even Leaving Proves it Right Intro/Hook When I publicly broke with my religion, Thelema, I heard I had never been a “real” believer in the first place. But I also heard that leaving Thelema was one of the most Thelemic things I could do — because I was…
The Spirituality That Made Abuse Feel Like Growth
The Spirituality That Made Abuse Feel Like Growth The Occult Teacher Who Taught Me to Accept Harm Opening This video contains my personal interpretations, experiences, and opinions regarding O.T.O., its teachings, and public statements made by its members. All quotations are presented in context to the best of my ability. If I have misstated any…
I Wasn’t Brainwashed. I Was Worse.
I Wasn’t Brainwashed. I Was Worse. My Confession Opening It was 2019. I was home when one of the senior leaders of my group—a friend—texted me asking to talk. Now we’re on the phone with one another. “I noticed the post you made to Facebook this afternoon,” he said. “Okay,” I said. “What about it?” …
I Thought Leaving Would Destroy Me
I Thought Leaving Would Destroy Me Opening Journal entry, May 7, 2025: “I will be more alone than ever before. I will look back on my choice and think: I left too soon. I was rash. I was afraid at the moment I should have had courage. I am rejecting initiation. This failure will lead…
Why Questioning Everything Still Kept Me Trapped for 11 Years
Why Questioning Everything Still Kept Me Trapped for 11 Years Opening “You’re rejecting the difficulties of the Work.” “Your resistance is unresolved trauma.” “What if you being attacked is the Universe trying to teach you a lesson?” These are the kinds of things I heard when I spoke out against a high-control group I’d been…
When Enduring Harm Feels Like Growth
When Enduring Harm Feels Like Growth She threatened them with bear spray. They let her stay. Opening A woman had threatened an entire congregation with bear spray. And instead of being kicked out… she was given conditional attendance. Now I’m sitting in the living room of one of the group’s senior leaders. I say, “Yeah,…
Why “Deep” Spiritual Advice Is Actually Dangerous
Why “Deep” Spiritual Advice is Actually Dangerous Bullshit is the Engine of Spiritual Manipulation Opening “That’s not a problem — it’s your process.” “If it triggered you, there’s something in you that needs to be healed.” “There are no victims — only lessons.” Most people think the danger in spiritual communities is false belief. Overt…